School Pictures '09

Since I'm too lazy to actually hang these up in frames, I'll just post it on here so I can look at them :0)

Here's my two boys in the morning:



Josiah ~ 1st grade ~ 6 years old.



Elias ~ Preschool ~ 3 years old.

Elias' 1st Field Trip

Here we gooooooo!


Elias went on his first field trip with Rainbow Schools a few weeks ago. Pumpkin Patch! He was so excited when the bus pulled up in the parking lot. "Moooommmm! Looook! A schoooooool bus!" The whole way down we spotted big trucks, tractors, police cars, and the ocean.
As soon as we got to the farms, Elias decided he didn't want to wear shoes anymore. He was putting up such a fuss I just let him go. So here he was, running all around the pricklies with his Moloka'i feet. But then when it was time to go for the hayride, I told him he had to wear shoes. If it wasn't for that hayride, I think he would've walked around all day barefoot. He hates shoes!

We looked all around the patch for the perfect pumpkin.

This one?





No, I found another one mom!




oooOoooOoo, that's a nice one! But you don't want that one either?




This one Elias? You don't want a bigger one? "No, cuz I'm small too." :0)

Happy Halloween!

I know it's been awhile, but it's finally time to put up the few pictures I have from Halloween. It was ummmm... quiet... man, things sure aren't the same when I was small. We went trick-or-treating down our street and that was fun to see all of our neighbors. I really love this neighborhood. The people are so cool and easy to talk story with. What's funny is that we give each other goodies often. Extra cake, fish, candy, etc. and we don't know each other's names. But we talk like we've known each other for decades. so funny.

Anyway, Halloween. A couple days before the YM & YW had a little activity for the kids. So cute. And Halloween night after trunk or treat we went over to Sina's new house and had some ono grinds and the kids just played.

Perspective

Things have been really tough lately. Money, time, everyday responsibilities, everything seems so out of balance. I pray for guidance and peace of mind and my blessings are my children. Yesterday and today we played in the park. They rode their bikes, we played basketball, played with sticks, went down fast on the hills, rolled in the grass, looked at clouds, touched sleeping grass, and laughed at each other making silly faces. They even thought I was the coolest for blowing bubbles with my chewing gum.

My Aunty Nancy once told me that the best years of her life were when her children were young. I think this is the best age for me & my boys. 36 & 6 & 3. good numbers maybe?

Yes, reality is still there and it pretty muc h sucks at the moment. But I don't want to rob happiness & innocence from Josiah & Elias. Awareness is key. Stuff like, "we can't buy crayons because we don't have $" & having them know that we can't do things we used to do is good. But stressin' out and taking it out on them isn't a good thing. I love them with every ounce of my being. I want them to be happy. I want them to be hard workers, and help others, and be outside. I want them to read books and travel and meet new people. But I also want them to be rooted. To know who they are and where they come from. To be confident in themselves and choose the right. To be positive and carry and uplifting vibe within.

My Josiah Kahiau & My Elias Kamaehu... mommy loves you...

Bubbles

Yesterday Elias and I were in the patio feeding birds and singing primary songs. He found a bottle of bubbles and I started blowing away. There wasn't much wind so the bubbles lingered a little longer ~ just enough for Elias to catch them. His face & expression & reaction was just pure delight. Josiah came out to see what Elias was laughing about and played for a second. Then he walked away back into the house and said, "it's just bubbles". Oh that brought tears to my eyes. I remember when Josiah was so happy playing with bubbles ~ it was the greatest thing ever at one time in his life. He is growing up & I miss those carefree days with him. I mean I know he's only six, and we still have many more memories to make, but I miss those "bubbles" days.



I remember when we lived up in Mauka, right across the street from the huge park & ride. He started walking when he was 10 months old & he had so much energy that our little apartment couldn't hold him. So I would always take him out to the park where he could just run his little heart out. He was fascinated with the weeds because they were taller than he was. Just seeing him run around and in between them & collecting them was such an adventure.

Don't grow up too fast, my Siah...

Stop Whining, Breathe, and Push

So here is the story that helps motivate me when I'm whining about school...

When I was giving birth to Josiah, (there's a point - I PROMISE!) I
had all the support I needed. I was in one of the nicest birthing
facilities, I was fully prepared with the essentials, I had taken
classes, watched videos and read books. Pat was there and after an
hour trying to wake him up, was fully supportive. The nurse was
wonderfully nice and I got the epidural as planned while my doctor
was on her way. Everything was going smoothly - until I started
feeling the contractions.

The epidural didn't work! I was freakin' out. My nice nurse
brought towels to wipe my head and was coaching me saying "you can
do it" and offering all kinds of suggestions to help me along the
process. But no matter how hard I tried, it wasn't working.

The nurse's shift ended and before she left she introduced me to my
new nurse - Jacintha. She was the total opposite of the nice
nurse. She was a no-frills, straightforward, in-your-face gal.
When the nice nurse told her what happened with my epidural
failing,
she offered no sympathy. All she said was, "you ready?"

My contractions were unbearable, Josiah was crowning, and I was
screaming. I've never felt so much dang pain in my life. I grabbed
Pat's shirt and yelled, "Help me!" all he did was stare at me -
speechless (Now I know why midwives are better). I was struggling
for any type of support from anybody. Pat and another nurse came in
and cooled my head offering words of encouragement. I yelled, "I
can't do this!"

Jacintha put down whatever she was doing and leaned over right into
my face. She said sternly, "If you're not gonna do it, who is? How
the hell is that baby gonna come out? Of course you gotta do it.
Stop whining, breathe, and push."

After she said that, I was fully focused. Even though it was
freakin' painful as hell, I gave birth the "natural" way to Josiah.
I felt EVERYTHING. Some people say that you forget the pain after a
while. Heck no! I totally remember it! ALL!

When I think back on that one moment, I'm so glad I had Jacintha
instead of the nice nurse. The mean nurse got me focused and I did
it on my own.

Neverending...

Yes. I'm still in school pursuing a graduate degree. It's getting near the end and I can see it in sight, yet I can't... if that makes any sense. Honestly, I'm so burnt out. It's taking forever. And I get myself sick when I see my friends & colleagues who started the same time I did and have already graduated. I sometimes think, "why did I choose this longer program again??" All that matters is that paper right? No, really. I'm glad I'm in this ~ and I have to keep reminding myself that it's the content of the degree that I love and I couldn't get it any other way. I absolutely LOVE what I'm learning ~ it's everything I always wanted to know and it has opened up my mind, eyes, and heart to a thousand doors and a million windows. It really is amazing how formal education can expand and stretch you to limits you didn't even know existed.

So I'll keep on keeping on and kick myself in the buti once in awhile. I'll post later on my "Stop Whining, breathe, and push" story that is my cohort's mantra. I need to read it again and remember that I need to finish this baby up.